I’m hesitant to say that life’s been kicking my ass lately because I can pretty much handle it, but life’s definitely been a pain in my ass lately.
I’ve pulled three or four all-nighters this week, simply due to either stress or boredom or a combination of the two.
Work is still terrible, I make cakeballs and sandwiches with the PTA moms for minimum wage a few times a week.
I almost got my driver’s license this week, but my dumb ass didn’t fill out any of the paperwork that I was supposed to, so I’m rescheduling.
Realized I’m well on my way to becoming the embodiment of [REDACTED]. In all honesty, the only reason I’m calling her [REDACTED] anymore is because I still hold some sort of unearned respect for her. By all means, I’m not a fan of her. I don’t even really consider her to be family anymore.
To be honest, I just kind of stopped giving a shit about her, and so that part of my life’s been mostly okay. This local Alanon group really helped me with that, and they’re helping me with a lot of the stuff that came with that. For those of you who don’t know what Alanon is, they’re basically Alcoholics Anonymous, but for people who deal with addicts. If you’re struggling with someone else’s addiction, I’d suggest popping into one of their meetings sometime.
I’ve been working on a few projects for a while now. The first one was more of a script than anything, but it wasn’t going anywhere creatively, so I killed it. The second was pretty close to the original, in the sense that the project itself was more ambitious than I could deal with; I gave it the axe, too. The third and fourth projects were the post I made recently, titled Tommy’s Guys and The Monster. I’ve been toying with the idea of writing whatever comes to mind when it comes to mind, and these were the first two experiments, for lack of a better word.
The first, Tommy’s Guys, was just a short dialogue between two thieves in New York after an encounter with a fictional gangster’s henchmen. I had a lot of fun writing it, and it didn’t take too much effort to do. If any more interesting dialogues pop into my head, I’ll be sure to put ’em here.
The second, The Monster, was something I’ve wanted to do for a while now. I’ve always been fascinated with retellings of classic stories or ideas, such as everyone’s childhood fear of the monster under their bed. I wanted to capture what might’ve been going through the monster’s mind, rather than the child’s, because I figured I could have a lot of fun with it. And I gotta say, it took more work than I thought, but I had a lot of fun making that idea come to life.
In the upcoming months, I’ve got a few plans for what I want to post and when I want to post it. There will be more dialogues and short stories, and maybe a guest post or two. I’ve got bigger, more ambitious plans for future posts and even the future of this site, and I’m excited to see how they’ll fare with you, the reader.
To sum everything up, my life isn’t terrible, but it’s pretty fuckin’ annoying. I’m done giving a shit about [REDACTED], and I’m gonna be making more creative posts as opposed to whining about my life all the time. Of course, if there are any major developments in the life of Yours Truly, y’all’ll find out pretty soon after I do. Oh, and expect more Texan grammar in my non-creative posts. It’s a lot of fun to write with, and it makes perfect grammatical sense!
I almost forgot: I’ve been off all meds for about two weeks now. At first, the withdrawal symptoms were goddamn horrible; I was dizzy, irritable, and tired all the time. The OCD is back, and in all its unbridled glory. But I’m handling it. Not washing as much, and when I do, I don’t care that I am. Not feeling depressed, either. A little down from time to time, and a bit like life is worthless, but I’m trying to to get motivated to do things. And little by little, it’s working. After all, here I am, writing at 6:43 am, drinking shitty coffee and ignoring the sunrise.
Come to think of it, this coffee tastes soapy. I guess I should’ve expected that from the generic coffee I got at Wal-Mart. I might have my OCD under control, but I will never, ever like Wal-Mart. Seriously. Fuck those guys.
Regardless, the future is bright. Walk tall, be proud. More generic inspirational crap. But most importantly, keep on keepin’ on, guys.
Thanks for reading.
-Ob Co Di